September 2011
1 post
August 2011
17 posts
“It’s much easier to not know things sometimes. Things change and friends leave. And life doesn’t stop for anybody. I wanted to laugh. Or maybe get mad. Or maybe shrug at how strange everybody was, especially me. I think the idea is that every person has to live for his or her own life and than make the choice to share it with other people. You can’t just sit there and put everybody’s lives ahead of yours and think that counts as love. You just can’t. You have to do things. I’m going to do what I want to do. I’m going to be who I really am. And I’m going to figure out what that is. And we could all sit around and wonder and feel bad about each other and blame a lot of people for what they did or didn’t do or what they didn’t know. I don’t know. I guess there could always be someone to blame. It’s just different. Maybe it’s good to put things in perspective, but sometimes, I think that the only perspective is to really be there. Because it’s okay to feel things. I was really there. And that was enough to make me feel infinite. I feel infinite.”
—Stephen Chbosky (via atomos)
“He nearly called you again last night. Can you imagine that, after all this time? He can. He imagines calling you or running into you by chance. Depending on the weather, he imagines you in one of those cotton dresses of yours with flowers on it or in faded blue jeans and a thick woollen button-up cardigan over a checked shirt, drinking coffee from a mug, looking through your tortoiseshell glasses at a book of poetry while it rains. He thinks of you with your hair tied back and that characteristic sweet scent on your neck. He imagines you this way when he is on the train, in the supermarket, at his parents’ house, at night, alone, and when he is with a woman. He is wrong, though. You didn’t read poetry at all. He had wanted you to read poetry, but you didn’t. If pressed, he confesses to an imprecise recollection of what it was you read and, anyway, it wasn’t your reading that started this. It was the laughter, the carefree laughter, the three-dimensional Coca-Cola advertisement that you were, the try-anything-once friends, the imperviousness to all that came before you, the chain telephone calls, the in-jokes, the instant music, the sunlight you carried with you, the way he felt when you spoke to his parents, the introductory undergraduate courses, the inevitability of your success, the beach houses, the white lace underwear, the private dancing, the good-graced acceptance of part-time shift work, the apparent absence of expectations, the ever-changing disposable cults of the rural, the family, the eastern, the classical, the modern, the postmodern, the impoverished, the sleekly deregulated, the orgasm, the feminine, the feminist, and then the way you canceled with the air of one making a salad.”
—Seven Types of Ambiguity (via aeloquence)
Hope →
loveisrain.tumblr.com
loveisrain:
I don’t hope you find all that you’re looking for. I hope you try. I hope you look for truth and I hope you sometimes look alone. I hope you carry your heart out in your hands and I hope it stains everything you touch. I hope you learn to love the winters as much as you love your summers. I hope you wait for sunsets like you wait for it to rise and I hope you look out your window every night to see where the moon is this time. I hope you learn to take pictures but remember that somethings you can’t keep forever. I hope you hope. I hope that you laugh until it hurts, always. And let yourself cry. But not always. I hope you look at people and see God. I hope you look at nature and see God. I hope you see Him in everything. I hope you make decisions and I hope you make mistakes and I hope you turn around and I hope you keep on going. I hope you realize that you really are that special. That you really are enough. I hope you never sell yourself short. Because you don’t have a price. I hope you learn to let people live and love, and I hope sometimes you teach them and I hope sometimes you learn from them. Because I hope you know you are not alone.
I don’t hope you find all that you’re looking for. This is because I hope you never stop looking. And living. And wanting. And changing.
July 2011
7 posts
“But most days, if you’re aware enough to give yourself a choice, you can choose to look differently at this fat, dead-eyed, over-made-lady who just screamed at her little child in the checkout line — maybe she’s not usually like this; maybe she’s been up three straight nights holding the hand of her husband who’s dying of bone cancer, or maybe this very lady is the low-wage clerk at the Motor Vehicles Dept. who just yesterday helped your spouse resolve a nightmarish red-tape problem through some small act of bureaucratic kindness. Of course, none of this is likely, but it’s also not impossible — it just depends on what you want to consider. If you’re automatically sure that you know what reality is and who and what is really important — if you want to operate on your default-setting — then you, like me, will not consider possibilities that aren’t pointless and annoying. But if you’ve really learned how to think, how to pay attention, then you will know you have other options. It will actually be within your power to experience a crowded, loud, slow, consumer-hell-type situation as not only meaningful but sacred, on fire with the same force that lit the stars — compassion, love, the sub-surface unity of all things. Not that that mystical stuff’s necessarily true: The only thing that’s capital-T True is that you get to decide how you’re going to try to see it. You get to consciously decide what has meaning and what doesn’t. You get to decide what to worship…”
—David Foster Wallace on Life and Work - WSJ.com (via californieflanerie)
“The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers, wider Freeways, but narrower viewpoints. We spend more, but have less, we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgment, more experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less wellness. We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom. We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.We’ve learned how to make a living, but not a life. We’ve added years to life not life to years. We’ve been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor. We conquered outer space but not inner space. We’ve done larger things, but not better things. We’ve cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul. We’ve conquered the atom, but not our prejudice. We write more, but learn less. We plan more, but accomplish less. We’ve learned to rush, but not to wait. We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less and less.”
—Bob Moorehead (via atomos)
Play
November 2010
2 posts
July 2009
7 posts
5:03 a.m
There’s nothing like a late night/early morning pensive mood. You come up with one million seventy five thousand four hundred and one conclusions of life and seven hundred ways of approaching it :)
It is so hard to get to where you’ve always dreamed to be when the price is leaving all you’ve ever known, loved or cared for. However, it is in those transitions, and in those separations from everything that is so attatched to you, that God opens up the door of your dreams and says: “Run. You are free!” Let’s release all those things that we are so dearly accustomed to, and the people we are so dearly attatched to… Yes, it is hard, but the outcome will be worth it. Have faith. Live in absolute joy. Run.
Life. Love. Freedom.
Something that has been on my mind for quite a while…
We all, somehow, go through our lives trying to live so much, that we forget to live. Ironic… yet very common. We try to fulfill our emptiness with everything, or anything, no matter how degrading it may be. We TRY… However, during that trial and error process we often forget about the life that God, our creator, intended for us to have; Life in abundance, filled with a Joy that is permanent, and that does not rely on any circumstance, but is found deep within our hearts and our spirits, a joy that does not cease, no matter what chaos we may encounter. I have found myself with such an immense desire to live, that I lost myself and the true essence of living somewhere in there. I’m pretty sure I’m not the only one to whom this has occurred. I see it daily; we go on unnoticed because we are too busy trying… People are in a constant pursuit of happiness, and not only those who don’t know who God is, don’t have a relationship with him, or don’t know his love; but it’s within the church. We are searching for something to fill that void that only God can fill; and not only through prayer, sacrifices and his word, which will all lead to victory, but by truly seeking the holy spirit within us, using the discernment and the qualities that God has already placed inside of us, for we are his temple, WE are the church, and we are the body. (I believe all it takes is for us to activate, and wake up that sleeping giant…). When we learn to seek God with all that we are, wholeheartedly and in spirit and in truth (not mind and emotions), is when we will experience the happiness we deserve and we will have the wisdom to know what we must do so that joy will remain in us and our spirit will be edified. (Obedience is a major key… Although we may think something will bring us joy, God knows our hearts, and our mind is deceiving; we must trust God and be obedient to reach that true happiness…) Our joy will make God happy. He did not create us to suffer, Jesus did all the suffering there was to be done, we must now live in the freedom that he gave us, if we don’t, and if we continue to be bound by the mentality of this corrupted world, and sadly, at times, a corrupted church, then his death was truly in vain. We must renew our minds daily and ask Him to protect us from those mentalities that hinder us and corrupt our ways. I have often heard the discussion of the fact that we don’t want Jesus’ death to have been in vain, but what we don’t realize is that that is the very thing we are doing, throwing his sacrifice out the window. I believe many of us, including myself, do not live a life that pleases God to the fullest; we live bound and enslaved to the things of this world, to the things of Man, to rules and to restrictions that mankind has created and has labeled to be God’s “rules” or “restrictions”, when Jesus’ life, death and resurrection was all to set us free. All bondages were BROKEN in Christ’s death, and now it is time for us to free ourselves from our own corrupted and confused mindsets and the mentalities that this world, and those who surround us have placed in us, forbidding us to expand our minds and our lives, and to open up to receive ALL that God has for us. When we understand the real freedom we have been already granted through God’s great love is when we will begin to really LIVE. It is our turn to show him our gratitude, and our profound love for him. But hold it one second… I don’t mean a love that we produce with our minds by thinking that it is what we are “supposed to do”; but a Love that comes from the very depth of our spirits, a love that is not as easy as it is to say “I love you…”, but a love that would do anything and everything to achieve His pleasure, a love that is shown by our actions and our lives. One that if we do not yet own, we must ask Him to place in us and to help us create, because if we don’t have love, then we are nothing. LOVE SETS US FREE. God’s love has already done that, He has already unlocked those jail gates in the spiritual realm, all we need to do is open the gates and live in absolute FREEDOM. We must live to love, and love to live, because LOVE is the breath of life… GOD is the breath of life.
P.S.: To whoever actually read this: there is way too much on my mind to fully express it in words… please pardon me if I have obscured your minds :)
My First :)
So I have never had any form of expressing my thoughts, either on paper or on any tenchnological gadget.. (unless it’s my journal in english class, but thats as much as it gets). I’m excited. I hope I actually use this thing :)
